Tag Archive | darkness

Find me in the River

My last post included a video.. you have to play it on my site because it does not show up as a video if you receive email updates. The song is Find me in the River from a CD called streams that was released in 1999.. a tribute to the classic devotional Streams in the Desert.

Here are the lyrics:

Find me in the river
Find me on my knees
I’ve walked against the water
Now I’m waiting if you please

We’ve longed to see the roses
But never felt the thorns
And bought our pretty crowns
But never paid the price

Find me in the river
Find me there
Find me on my knees with my soul laid bare
Even though you’re gone and I’m cracked and dry
Find me in the river, I’m waiting here

Find me in the river
Find me on my knees
I’ve walked against the water
Now I’m waiting if you please

We didn’t count on suffering
We didn’t count on pain
But if the blessing’s in the valley
Then in the river I will wait.

The whole CD is worth listening to if you find yourself in the wilderness or the dark valley..



A door to another world..

I recently completed a class at the seminary on Spiritual Direction. During the last meeting we were asked to draw a picture of something that represented our experience in the class. My picture showed a door out in the middle of a meadow ( no building..just a door) with a beautifully colored sky and a glowing sunset in the corner. I drew this because the class opened a door for me into a beautiful place.. a huge place..the sky represented the vastness and the beauty of that place.

There are moments when God invites us into a new place with Him. They are turning points and we rarely see them coming. One observation I’ve made from my own life is that these times seem to come out of a season of quiet desperation. We may find ourselves in a dark tunnel with only tiny glimpses of light..we may be weary..worn out..fed up..depressed..needy and at the same time hungry. Yes hungry.. for more of God. Our hearts are crying out for something more. We are in touch with our need for more. Is this all there is God?

Suddenly He opens a door..like the one in my picture. He calls to us. “Come closer, don’t give up..I have something for you.” We were never forgotten, never abandoned, and never neglected. He was waiting.. longing to meet us but knowing that we were not ready. He held back until  our hands were empty..until our hearts were desperate. Why? So we would know it was Him. It is so easy to forget how faithful He is.. to go down our own roads..until we run into a wall. Our need is huge and there He is..waiting breathlessly to reveal something wonderful..something lavish..something rich.. something perfect for us.

“Lord, You have always given
bread for the coming day;
and though I am poor,
today I believe.

Lord, You have always given
strength for the coming days;
and though I am weak,
today I believe.

Lord, You have always given
peace for the coming day;
and though of anxious heart,
today I believe.

Lord, You have always kept me
safe in trials;
and now, tired as I am,
today I believe.

Lord, You have always marked
the road for the coming day;
and though it may be hidden,
today I believe.

Lord, You have always lightened
the darkness of mine;
and though the night is here,
today I believe.

Lord, You have always spoken
when the time was ripe;
and though you be silent now,
today I believe”        (Celtic expression of faith)


Our valley is filled with it this morning.. I can hardly see across the street. From my balcony the world is covered in a grey mist. A blue jay landed on the railing looking around.. he seemed to be wondering if he was in the right place. I can’t see all the beautiful trees, the hills, the blue skies, or the bay far off in the distance. All of these are familiar sights that I enjoy every morning. The morning is my time..I drink tea, write in my journal, and talk with God.. I love looking out at the beauty while this is happening..a great reminder of our Creator.

The fog today was a different type of reminder.. it seemed to be speaking to me about life and how it may be shrouded in darkness. Sometimes we look out toward our spiritual path and we cannot see ahead. Our steps are taken by faith without sight. The fog is surrounding us and we have to use our memories to guide us. We remember that the path is not gone..that God is not far away..that the future is going to be good. We trust that the blue skies and sunshine will return. We believe that God is in the darkness, holding our hands and guiding us.

Is there fog in your life today? Do you feel like the future is uncertain and surrounded by mystery. Join me in trusting in the goodness of God. He knows every inch of that path that you are on and He will guide you as you step forward with Him. We cannot let the darkness stop us or discourage us..it is there for a reason. Our faith will grow stronger as we exercise it and rely on Him and not our own senses. He is with us!

“We don’t yet see things clearly. We’re squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won’t be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We’ll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!”   ( from the Message 1Cor 12:13)