Up until about a year or two ago.. I had never heard of this day. I was raised by atheist Jews and most of my church life was in a charismatic/non-denominational church where Christian history was not a big focus. It is a big day.. the day when Jesus ate the Passover meal with His disciples before he was crucified.
Since I am spending so much time alone.. I’m not always aware of days and dates.. very strange for someone like me.. an ENFJ..we like structure. So tonight when I realized the date and remembered that tomorrow was good Friday, I thought about what happened two thousand years ago. When Jesus was eating with the twelve, He knew what was going to happen next. It could not have been a surprise. His heart must have been aching to explain things to them..He knew that He would suffer a terrible death..they would not understand what it all meant. He knew they would suffer an unbearable loss and it would result in the greatest rescue that ever happened.
Thinking about all this reminded me of the losses in my own life. Every big loss has been very hard..I wrote about my Dad’s death in my last post. I also lost my uncle shortly after Dad died. In 2008 my sister-in-law died ( she and I were the same age) ..a cousin, I grew up with died, about a year ago.. (he was younger than me) Ten years ago my husband lost his job right after our honeymoon. We met the year 911 happened and he was a casualty of the dot.com collapse the next year. So much loss..not just for me.. our whole country has been in a state of grief for the last decade.
As I continue to mourn my losses.. (I will share more of them in future posts) I want to stop for a moment and remember that day when He was one of us. He felt the deepest grief that could ever be imagined to bring us closer to His heart.
“Jesus replied, “You don’t understand now what I am doing, but someday you will ”